Leyendo entre mis cosas me di cuenta que extrañaba mucho la conexión que solíamos tener, pasamos mucho tiempo anhelando lo que no teníamos que en eso se convirtió nuestra relación, en las cosas que nos faltaban, le dimos tanta importancia que al final las que si teníamos se perdieron, Hoy me detuve a hablar un tiempo con un amigo y me di cuenta de que teníamos tantas cosas, y pienso que el hecho de que no nos entendamos y el hecho de que no seamos compatibles son muy diferentes, no creo que no seamos compatibles, la verdad es que en mi opinion solo hemos tenido demasiadas diferencias las cuales nunca resolvimos, heridas que se quedaron abiertas y nunca sanaron, y no se puede seguir adelante si no nos curamos y no podemos sanar sino resolvemos esas diferencias.
It reminded me all the things I used to enjoy about being with you, all the sexy conversations we used to have instead of just going to business, the way you used to make me feel when you were staring at me and the things you used to tell my by messages... 🤯 I didn’t feel good about myself and felt very abandoned, I felt misunderstood, I felt like you never validated my feelings because I wasn’t crying, because I avoided confrontation, because I just stone walled instead of going too deep, but even after all that, after reading from your own letter that you thought I was taking advantage of you, reading that you just wanted me to leave you to be happy like I was an obstacle for you to be happy, and even after all that I wasn’t thinking on leaving you, I just wish you could understand that I suffered, that I cried alone as well, I just wish you could move on with me instead of moving on away from me, I wish you find a way to let go all that resentment, I wish you could go back in time and remember the things that made us happy from each other, I mean you probably remember the things that I used to do that made you happy but... do you remember the ones you used to do that made me happy? Do you remember how you got lost with me as well? Do you really believe that you have been behaving like the person I fall in love with? And if you are not... why are you any different than me? I don’t want to blame you, but I also don’t want you to blame me, this is the reason why I stone wall so much, to avoid feeling pointed fingers at, to avoid feeling like I’m a monster or something, I just wish you could understand that if we are not getting along is nobody’s fault but circumstances and situations, I’m sure you can tell me a million things I could have done to make things better, that maybe would have fix what was happening but I also have a million ideas of things you could’ve done to build me up, you wanted me to touch you, to want to kiss you, make love to you, but you could’ve gotten that easily, just with a different approach, in the same way you wouldn’t be here if my approach was different.
I’m so sad right now, we used to have such a strong connection, we used to talk for hours, watch the sunset together, I remember when I used to put my head in your lap and you will run your fingers through my hair while studying or reading, how you used to run your fingers in my back, I remember you used to say that you loved my back, the after sex was more amazing and intimate than the sex itself, I used to feel so comfortable in your bed, in your arms, and if I refuse to let you go is because I don’t think I could feel like that with anyone else and even if I could I don’t want to.
I get people trying to hit me up as I’m sure you do too, and I feel gross even to think about it, I just can’t even think about touching someone else, or kissing them... and even if I had reasons to avoid kissing you, I literally love your lips and your eyes... sometimes I see the videos of us in the past and it was so sexy to me the way you used to react after kissing me, like licking or biting your lips like you really liked it, but with time even that stopped, it was like you got enough of it, like you didn’t want them anymore and even when you were complaining when you didn’t have them your reaction was no longer the same, and all that helped with my insecurities but hell I miss those times.
I’ll keep writing ✍️ as long as I feel like I have things to say
It reminded me all the things I used to enjoy about being with you, all the sexy conversations we used to have instead of just going to business, the way you used to make me feel when you were staring at me and the things you used to tell my by messages... 🤯 I didn’t feel good about myself and felt very abandoned, I felt misunderstood, I felt like you never validated my feelings because I wasn’t crying, because I avoided confrontation, because I just stone walled instead of going too deep, but even after all that, after reading from your own letter that you thought I was taking advantage of you, reading that you just wanted me to leave you to be happy like I was an obstacle for you to be happy, and even after all that I wasn’t thinking on leaving you, I just wish you could understand that I suffered, that I cried alone as well, I just wish you could move on with me instead of moving on away from me, I wish you find a way to let go all that resentment, I wish you could go back in time and remember the things that made us happy from each other, I mean you probably remember the things that I used to do that made you happy but... do you remember the ones you used to do that made me happy? Do you remember how you got lost with me as well? Do you really believe that you have been behaving like the person I fall in love with? And if you are not... why are you any different than me? I don’t want to blame you, but I also don’t want you to blame me, this is the reason why I stone wall so much, to avoid feeling pointed fingers at, to avoid feeling like I’m a monster or something, I just wish you could understand that if we are not getting along is nobody’s fault but circumstances and situations, I’m sure you can tell me a million things I could have done to make things better, that maybe would have fix what was happening but I also have a million ideas of things you could’ve done to build me up, you wanted me to touch you, to want to kiss you, make love to you, but you could’ve gotten that easily, just with a different approach, in the same way you wouldn’t be here if my approach was different.
I’m so sad right now, we used to have such a strong connection, we used to talk for hours, watch the sunset together, I remember when I used to put my head in your lap and you will run your fingers through my hair while studying or reading, how you used to run your fingers in my back, I remember you used to say that you loved my back, the after sex was more amazing and intimate than the sex itself, I used to feel so comfortable in your bed, in your arms, and if I refuse to let you go is because I don’t think I could feel like that with anyone else and even if I could I don’t want to.
I get people trying to hit me up as I’m sure you do too, and I feel gross even to think about it, I just can’t even think about touching someone else, or kissing them... and even if I had reasons to avoid kissing you, I literally love your lips and your eyes... sometimes I see the videos of us in the past and it was so sexy to me the way you used to react after kissing me, like licking or biting your lips like you really liked it, but with time even that stopped, it was like you got enough of it, like you didn’t want them anymore and even when you were complaining when you didn’t have them your reaction was no longer the same, and all that helped with my insecurities but hell I miss those times.
I’ll keep writing ✍️ as long as I feel like I have things to say
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